Excellence University Journal

Interpersonal Expertise Tip: Collective Rejuvenating Via Genuine Relaxation and Fun

by Dr. Brian Higley

January 30th, 2010

We live in a society that often encourages an “all work and no play” mentality, which often leaves both our personal and professional relationships neglected and stagnant.  So often, our relationships begin with a focus on enhancing each others’ enjoyment of  life and/or work only to “devolve” into ruts and routines.  This Interpersonal Expertise Tip focuses on how to set aside enough time and energy to energize our relationships – and rediscover the excitement and energy that brought us together in the first place.

Collective rejuvenation can be facilitated by committing to providing all parties with opportunities to experience genuine (not forced or faked) relaxation and fun.  We are not talking about get-togethers that only some people truly enjoy; everyone knows that some people only pretend to have fun at certain office parties or family reunions while others are genuinely enjoying themselves out of fear of punishment or rejection.  We are talking about experiences that allow everyone the chance to truly unwind and/or experience genuine “belly laugh” fun.  Here are some ways people have been able to promote collective rejuvenation:

• Phase I: Commit to understanding what rejuvenates all parties (and to respecting differences in relation to this topic). Most of us can relate to having to spend time in “fun” activities with others that were actually stressful or boring to us.  Collective rejuvenation demands a respect for the differences in how people experience fun and relaxation.  If we are truly going to provide opportunities for all people, a deep and consistent respect for this reality is a must.  One way to show respect for all parties is to invite everyone to list 5-10 things that they truly enjoy or that truly relax them.  This is often the first step toward collective rejuvenation.
• Phase II: Provide collective rejuvenation opportunities that are customized to everyone’s preferences. A critical step toward collective rejuvenation is the opportunity to support others as they rejuvenate in ways that work for them.  So often, the opposite can be true; we try to convince others to do things that we enjoy instead of what will energize or relax them.  One relationship myth that perpetuates this less than best practice is the idea that we must do these sorts of things together as one group in order to “team build” or help our relationships.  So often the opposite is true; when all parties feel as though they are being encouraged to relax or energize in their own ways, team- and relationship-building happens!
• Phase III: Make collective rejuvenation a priority by understanding how it can energize everyone to deliver on other priorities (both personal and professional). I know from experience that it can be very easy to be excited about providing others with the opportunity to rejuvenate in customized, personalized ways at first – then lose sight of why doing so throughout the days, weeks, months and years is so important as other priorities emerge.  To maintain a commitment to collective rejuvenation, it can be helpful to consistently remind ourselves and those around us of two things: (1) that fun and relaxation are critical to a satisfied life and (2) that energized and enthusiastic people are much, much better equipped to  address other priorities in life.  In other words, if we want to be more effective and satisfied in life, and help spread this to others, regular collective rejuvenation is a huge asset!

NOTE TO THOSE USING THE MISSION FULFILLMENT SYSTEM: You can move toward increased Interpersonal Expertise by adding a new Objective to your system by using the “Add New Item” link (for example, “Promote collective rejuvenation with my teammates, family and friends”).  You can then develop a SMART Goal related to that new Objective by using the “Add Subitem” link to the far right of the new Objective (for example, “Ask my interested teammates, friends and family members to develop a collective rejuvenation activities list with me.”).

FOR THOSE WHO ARE NOT ON THE MISSION FULFILLMENT SYSTEM: Click here to for more information and click here to sign up.

FINAL NOTE: If you were linked to this article by a video or email, please return to that link and proceed with any other instructions that you deem helpful.  For more Execution Excellence and Interpersonal Expertise tips and tools visit our site at: www.excellenceuniversity.net

Article Filed under: 2. Interpersonal Expertise Tips