Interpersonal Expertise Tip: Avoiding Unnecessary Conflict, Resolving Necessary Conflict
by Dr. Brian Higley | 1 comment
Many of us have been raised reading fairy tales that often end with the heroes living “happily ever after” once they have overcome “the bad guys.” Contrary to the relationship myth of happily ever after, occasional friction in long-term relationships of all kinds (professional and personal) is often unavoidable, no matter how many interpersonal barriers (or “bad guys/ineffective habits”) are overcome. This conflict can be draining and overwhelming if not handled with skill and care. The good news is that if addressed well, interpersonal conflict can actually open the door to more effective and satisfying relations with others.
Because conflict in relationships is a given from time to time, it can be important to develop the ability to avoid unnecessary conflict while facing and resolving the necessary conflicts with others in our lives. This can be done in three phases: (1) identification of avoidable conflicts and minimization of such conflicts, (2) identification of unavoidable conflicts and genuine resolution of these conflicts, and (3) transformation of currently unavoidable conflicts into conflicts that can eventually become more avoidable in the future. (more…)